Tuesday, April 10, 2007 . 3:14:00 PM
had a tiff at 9 April nite. y? always mi! cant i do wad i like, say or eat wad i wan. 20 years! being at home alone, or with u all.... u all still dun understand or know wad i like to eat? i m not a kid anymore. y still force mi to eat wad i dun like to eat. so angry.... that i thrown away the whole packet of brown rice away. and made my dad scold mi n my mum get scolded by him. heard her cried n scolding mi. I dun give it a DAMN! y? always mi, not my fault, knew i dun like to eat dun cook so much, i dun eat den u should know he give mi a damn face, wasnt u wan tis to happen? i m your DAUGHTER! NOT YUR MAID OR WADEVER! no one cares or concern abt mi.... 20 years, i always get scolded mostly, wad do u all care about, korkor only.. u all dun feel it at all, always n everyday worried abt he nv come home, he stay outside, all tis all that.. den wad, told mi abt wad his doing.. DEN? ask auntie to say mi, wen u all cant tok back with each other.. wad u all wan mi to do. wan mi to tell kor wad u all tink.... dun be IDIOT, he NOT my son! I DUN GIVE IT A DAMN, he coming back or nt, is u all de problem..... i jus wan to do wad i tink is right. i always think abt the future for u all first. do u all think abt mi, how i feel? so wad that i m a fillial daughter or nt, u all still wan SON BUT NOT DAUGHTER... no matter how yur son treat u all, u all will jus "xin ruan" n tts all for it wen he is back or nv listen to wad u all say..... how abt mi? i jus listen to u all, stay home and tt it! u all gt care abt mi or nt! u all dun let mi go out with frenz, ok i stay home. wad u all told mi to do, i listen, cant i do something with on my own or i like~ i m a human NOT A DOG!I M YOUR CHILD>YOUR OWN DAUGHTER!
10 APRIL
went swimming alone, the moment i wake up. feel more relaxed. think alot of things while swimming in the water. wad if i m drown or dead outside? will dere anyone care? is it my fault to make my parent qurrel? wad should i do? buy back the rice to my dad? wad will happen if tonite get scolded again? ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH~ i jus hoping open school faster. at least gt something for mi to busy with.
Reach home watch tv! play com and waiting for the nite to fall~ n pass to the next day!